RACE REPORT: Outeniqua Marathon by Nico Kruger

In a moment of weakness, I allowed myself to be influenced to enter the 2024 PUFFER. This influence is due to a very determined club member who is very well known for the level of support that is provided to runners during road races and I warn all members to steer clear of said member as engaging with this member will almost certainly lead to indoctrination, persuasion and much regret. The member under discussion is extremely intelligent and no doubt a master at identifying the opportune time to strike. Like after the prey had enjoyed a few beers after a rustige Tuesday night Fish Hoek Athletic Club run and is in a wonderful mood, surrounded by like-minded friends.

As the saying goes: “No good ideas start over a glass of water”.

And so, I entered for the Puffer and it was only afterwards that I learnt that one has to earn the right of passage by completing a marathon in order to qualify for the PUFFER. This was a little bit of detail that said member had omitted to mention to me and I was now well and truly up the creek sans paddle and I had to accept that I, who had sworn off marathons 12 years ago, was going to have to relive the agony if I did not want to lose a great deal of face.

And I well remember that I ran that marathon in 2012 because a dear friend wanted to run his first marathon and asked me to accompany him for moral support. On reflection, now, 12 years later, it appears that I am not immune to persuasion. But, back to the Dubai Marathon. Flat. Tabletop flat. I am embarrassed to say that the runners were not even required to run up the little on-ramps leading to a highway as the route was literally 20km out and 20km back with a little teaser loop to add the 2.2km. We were running pleasantly through the 32km mark, me thinking how well this is going, when wham! A cramp pulled me up short. I mean pulled me up so badly that I could not walk one step forward or backward and had to find a spot to sit down, ever so gently. I have never, ever, experienced cramping while running and this was a complete shock to me. I feverishly tried to recall all the advice that I had read about and heard about cramping, dug deep into the memory banks about what Tim Noakes had to advise in Lore of Running, and Bruce Fordyce’s book Comrades, and Norrie Williamson’s Everyman’s Guide to Distance Running and tried stretching, tried changing my stride length, changed my posture, hell if I could walk on my hands I would have done so. I found no relief at all. After what seemed like an eternity (we runners do not like to NOT run when we are participating in a race), I finally found that I could in fact walk backwards and THAT released the spasm, which allowed me to run for about 100m before the cramp would set in again, walk in reverse etc and so I covered the last 10km in that fashion.

And I swore off marathons on that day.

And here I found myself on 27 April at 6.30AM at the starting line in George, silently cursing a certain club member. But I have to admit the excitement, the adrenaline, the camaraderie shared with other runners whom one does not know from a bar of soap but becomes so familiar with in the midst of pain all came back to me and I started enjoying the experience, despite myself.

The official results reflect those 256 runners completed the marathon and 485 participated in the half marathon. The marathon starts at the Trail Kiosk at Ground Zero in Van Riebeeck Gardens in George and finishes at the Commonage in front of the Wilderness Hotel in, well, Wilderness. The half marathon starts at Garden Route Dam an hour after the start of the marathon and the marathon route meets up with the half marathon route at the dam to allow for all participants to complete the race more or less together over the last 21km. In my case it was certainly less rather than more as I had determined that I would run ultra-conservative to finish what I had set out to accomplish. The latter part of the route from 21 is mostly through the forest and includes two very nasty hills to contend with.

It is a beautiful route though, and one forgives the mud and the pools of standing water that one has to negotiate when presented with spectacular views of lakes, dams, lush forest and of course, always the mountains.

The end at the Commonage was a welcome site. Shower, beer, another beer and I could start taking in and enjoying what I had accomplished. Wilderness is a great holiday resort and we frequented a number of restaurants, probably undoing all the good that I had achieved during the run, but this is what runners do, no?

I am pleased to be able to tick that box. Interestingly, STRAVA does not show this run as a marathon 🤔 as the distance recorded by my Garmin is 41.1km🤦🏻‍♂️. I wish to put it on record that there is no way that I shall be running another marathon to include that 100m that has mysteriously gone missing. Athletics SWD lists me as a finisher in 4h50m29s and in the event of a dispute the administrators of the PUFFER are welcome to take up the matter with Athletics SWD😉

Thank you to so many Fish Hoek members who were cheering for me, encouraging me and heaped praise on me for what was really not a great time, but this support is the essence of what I have found in Fish Hoek Athletic Club and what makes it such a great bunch of people.

But just be careful of one particular member who will appear at a time when you least expect it, your defences are down, you may be basking in the glow of friendship and fellowship and wham! you may find yourself committing to some insane event.

You have been warned.